Today, Paula Christine welcomes Sasha Rogers, a woman who left her career, bet on herself, and now helps others with their mindset.
We start with Paula's son, who is working very hard at a job he's not happy at. But he's well compensated and not ready to jump. Sasha feels he's got a certain savings number in his head. That's a common sticking point.
We spend some time talking about what we learned from our parents and what we teach our kids about money. It's very easy to be risk averse and not want to see bad things happen to your children, but you often have to give them the leeway to make mistakes and learn from them.
How do you take a giant step forward? The same way some people eliminate debt - the snowball method. Start with little, small successes, and stack these wins to build momentum.
When asked "What have you learned about money?" Sasha, says to spend the money to invest in yourself.
Want to learn more about Sasha? Email her at sasha@inneranthemacademy.com
Or find her on Instagram at @Sasha_fitcounselor
Email Paula Christine at Paula@PaulaChristine.com. You can also learn more online at www.PaulaChristine.com.
Paula: Hi. Welcome to Beyond the Paycheck. I'm Paula Christine. Today, we're going to be joined by Sasha Rogers who's a mental health expert who works with Inner Anthem Academy. Sasha, first of all, say hi. Then, I have a pressing question I need to ask.
Sasha: Hi everyone. I'm so glad to be here.
Paula: Oddly, perfect timing for this podcast because my son and I were texting this morning and I asked him how everything was going. He says he's been working 60 hours a week. I asked him, "Well, do you really like what you're doing?" He's like, "Not really, but I'm paid well." Then my response was, "Have you ever considered looking for something else?" He said, "Yes, but I'm not where I want to be financially to be able to look around. Once that happens, I will be searching." I responded but I'm curious. How would you have responded to that having just went out on your own and taking on that risk?
Sasha: He obviously has a number in mind. I would want to know that number, especially branching out on my own and realizing the freedom and the peace of mind and doing things that I'm more passionate about and I actually enjoy, I want more people to be able to experience that, and especially if it was my kid, I want them to be happy. I'm glad he is responsible and he is wanting to be responsible and secure in his decision-making but a lot of times that part of our personality can slow us down.
Is he afraid of insecurity and change or is there really a number in mind? What does that number even mean for him? What type of security uncertainty is that going to bring a year from now, five years from now that he doesn't have at this moment?
Paula: By number, you're meaning he has to have so much in savings?
Sasha: Yes, because he said he wasn't financially in a spot to be able to make an adjustment yet.
Paula: I get that and that's not quite how I answered it. Do you want to know how I answered it?
Sasha: Sure, yes.
Paula: I'll have to go back to my text. My text says, I said, "Sometimes you need to take the risk even though you think you aren't financially ready. Wonderful things happen when you go forward." That's how I answered that.
Sasha: That's great. It's total opposite parenting that I had in my life.
Paula: Oh yes, me too. What did you learn from your parenting that you brought into your business or not your parenting but how you were parented?
Sasha: The way that I was parented had a lot more certainty and more, be afraid of risk. That is something that I carried with me into adulthood and honestly what I believe led me to be so slow and even making the transitions that I knew for years that I wanted to make. It taught me how to fully commit. I believe be wise with money. Also, now in myself of realizing that money isn't everything and even just you encouraging him to branch out and to take that risk and that there actually can be reward on this side of uncertainty is so foreign to me that a parent would actually be willing to do that.
It does add something that I want to be able to do with my kids. They're so little right now that I want them to be able to know that there is risk and I of course want them to be responsible and to think things through. That there is great reward with risk and not be scared of making a wrong decision.
Paula: I didn't grow up with the attitude that I have now. I have worked really hard to get here. I know that I've taken on a lot of risk and because of that there's been huge rewards. There's also been times that I've had to struggle. Going out on your own and doing things isn't always easy, but if you have that desire, I think it's a desire and the commitment and you take--
I was reading this morning one thing that said about move. It's like you put out the intention of what you're going to do and then take an actionable step every day to get you towards that goal. I think if you do that, things are likely to, not think, I know when you do stuff like that, things are likely to happen for you. How can it not?
Sasha: It may not even be in the direction that you initially intended that things are going to happen.
Paula: What made you decide to go out on your own?
Sasha: Actually, having my first child is really what pushed me in that direction. The company that I was with, I was with them for 10 years within the organization. I was almost at the top of my game of this is the spot to be at. I had two people above me. I didn't think I was going to take over the company. I didn't want to own the company. I traveled a lot. I was on the road. At the time, it was okay.
Then I had my first little one right in the middle of COVID and I had been doing some of my own coaching and private counseling before this. My partner sounded a lot like you. He's like, "Take the risk. Do it on your own. I know you can do this. You work really hard. Stop second guessing yourself. You're not going to fail. That's not the type of person that you are." I was like, "The money is good. Things are really secure. I'm good at what I do." I just never wanted to go through that uncertainty and that fear of leaving. I went through it during the most time that I would want certainty-
Paula: COVID, no.
Sasha: -and not fear. COVID and I had my first baby. They said, "Okay, we need you back on the road." I'm traveling four days a week. I'm like, "That's not possible. I have a newborn. I'm not going to be able to do that." I had a hard decision to make. Did I want to continue to do this or did I need to make a shift? I decided ultimately to make a shift, went all in on myself and started my coaching business and being able to help people in the way that I was most passionate about. There's been great reward for it.
Paula: How nervous were you when you pulled that plug when you actually went in quit?
Sasha: Oh, I was so nervous. We were in a meeting and it was something like this, "Well, if you're not going to do this, we're not going to be able to afford to keep you." There was no other options. It was like, "Okay, we're forcing your hand." I felt like I am being fired from this company that I committed so much of my life with along with having the choice at the same time. It was a weird dynamic. It felt so strange that I was completely nervous. I'm like, "Okay, I have to go home and tell my partner that I don't have a job anymore. We're in the most uncertain time financially ever and we have this new baby. How is this going to work?"
I was so nervous and so scared. Luckily, he was so supportive. He's like, "This is your opportunity. This needed to happen."
Paula: I look at a lot of people that I talk to that I meet throughout the day and people are so afraid. One, they're afraid of failure but that means for sure you're going to fail because you didn't even try. It's hard to have the courage to quit your job or to walk out of a marriage or anything. It takes a lot of courage to do that. I know people struggle. Do you have any tools that you would tell a client that you're working with? Some tools they could use to maybe work through that to build that courage?
Sasha: I think so much of it starts with a belief system. Even when I'm working with my client because we have to break down so many of these false belief systems and these narratives and stories that we have told ourselves. We all have past experiences that a lot of times support, "I'm going to fail, I'm going to screw up. This is so scary." We need to be able to uncover what are those false belief systems, these stories that you've told yourself, and we're going to create something new.
I need them to come up with a vision. I need them to tell me and have evidence to support this new direction that they're trying to go.
Paula: What do you mean by evidence?
Sasha: For me, I even call it stacking wins with my clients is we have to build confidence and we have to have evidence that we can succeed. That starts with little bitty things that we can do throughout the day. Even, for example, something that I encourage everyone to do is just start off the morning with a win. It can be the simplest of task, just say making your bed, for example.
If you set out to do that task, I'm going to make my bed every single day and you do it, you've built confidence in yourself that you say you're going to do something and you're actually going to do it. That right there begins to build that confidence. That gives you evidence that you can see through your commitments and what you say you're going to do.
Jon: Paula, we've talked in previous episodes about the snowball effect when it comes to paying down debt, the snowball method where you just start paying off something small and build and build and build. It sounds like you're saying the exact same thing here too like a snowball effect where you do something small, get that win, and that leads to more and more and bigger and bigger wins.
Sasha: Yes, it's momentum. We need to gain momentum and there's multiple ways that we can do it, but just stacking wins is one small thing that we can do every single day to gain momentum.
Paula: I think rewarding yourself too as you're stacking those wins.
Sasha: I love that.
Paula: Becomes very important. You have to give yourself that pat on the back if it's taking yourself out to dinner or to lunch or just what it is, buying those new shoes or whatever, celebrating as you accomplish all the wins along the way. I think people forget to do that.
Sasha: They do. We're creatures that from a mental perspective, our brain, we like those hits of winning. We like dopamine. Being able to even celebrate those wins and trickle those in throughout our day programs on mind to want more of it.
Paula: I feel bad because I didn't make my bed this morning.
Sasha: That doesn't have to be your win.
Paula: You said that, I'm like, "I didn't make my bed this morning."
Sasha: Damn, didn't make my bed. That doesn't have to be your win. If that's not your thing, and it gives you no satisfaction in doing it, don't do it.
Paula: It does give me satisfaction actually making my bed. I just realized I did not make my bed. Jon, did you make your bed this morning?
Jon: I never make my bed. My wife would love if I made the bed but I just don't because the dog sleeps in the bed with us and it's just, eh, whatever.
Sasha: They don't get up usually.
Jon: No, no, it's not really our bed, it's more her bed. The dog, she just does what she wants.
Paula: The last question I'm going to ask you is, what has been your greatest lesson that you've learned over your lifetime about money?
Sasha: I think the greatest lesson that I have learned about money is that you actually have to invest money in yourself if you want to make money.
Paula: I agree. Invest in yourself if it's money or if it's education. Reading changes everything, I think if you can. There's a lot of great books, even YouTube videos on how to grow as a person and maybe make some improvements in your life.
Jon: I love that advice because all three of us to an extent have invested in ourselves to start our own business and do our own thing. You're not going to make money unless you spend money. Invest in yourself. I love that point, Sasha.
Sasha: That was something that I believe over the past few years I have invested a lot of money in myself in order to develop skill sets and to grow and to learn from people that are doing better than I am. That constantly pushes me, gives me new things to strive for and had me growing instead in challenging myself. Also, that support and accountability. I believe that we all need that. There's so many levels and layers to it.
There's always that opportunity and even, Paula, like you said, books, that is a small investment that someone can begin to make in themselves is just buy a book and then invest the time and being able to actually commit and read that book. You don't want to just sit there in order to take yourself to the next level that you want to get to.
Paula: I agree. Sometimes you even read just a few chapters of a book and you get what you need from it. I have tons of books on, I just call 'em self-help. I don't like that term but stuff to help me improve the person I am, to improve my business, to improve myself. Books are a great resource. If somebody would like to talk to you, maybe they're thinking about making some changes in their life, how would they get ahold of you?
Sasha: They can send me a message on Instagram. They can reach out to me on Facebook, or even through my email, whatever's most convenient. I would love to connect and see how I can just start the process of supporting them and transforming their mindset and then their physical health as well.
Paula: Why don't you give us your email real quick or the best way that you want them to contact you? We will put it in the show notes, but just in case someone wants to grab it now.
Sasha: It's @sasha_fitcounselor is my Instagram. My email is sasha@inneranthemacademy.com.
Paula: Thank you so much for being our guest today. We really appreciate it, great information. As always, I learn a lot from my guests. I'm glad that you liked the way that I interned my son today. I feel very good about that.
Sasha: Yes, I do. I think it's wonderful that you are encouraging him to take risk. I think parents are more risk-averse with their kids and we actually need to let them sell and learn and screw up really and grow from it.
Paula: Isn't that where you grow? Is in your screw-ups?
Sasha: Yes. We try to overly protect them.
Paula: I can't help that part. That's always ingrained in as mothers.
Sasha: Mike, we don't want anything horrible to happen though. We do need them to fail. They're growing courage that way.
Paula: I agree. It was so nice talking with you today. If anybody would like to get a hold of me, they can reach me @paulachristine.com or check up my website paulachristine.com.
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